Trump’s Health “Excellent,” Reports White House Physician


Rear Admiral Ronny Jackson, MD, the official Physician to the President briefed reporters today on the results of the president’s first physical exam since entering the White House.  Jackson said that while most of the results of the examination were good or normal, his cardiac health stood out to him as “excellent.”

He also credited the president’s DNA for his good health.  Jackson said that despite his lack of exercise and his notorious love of fast food, the president is in excellent health possibly because of his “incredible genes.”

“That’s just the way God made him,” Jackson said.

Jackson also revealed that President Trump took a cognitive test, used to measure mental impairments.  “I’ve found no reason whatsoever to think that the president has any issues whatsoever with his thought process,” Jackson said.  “He has absolutely no cognitive or mental issues whatsoever.”

When asked whether he believed the president is fit for duty, Jackson said “absolutely.” Jackson also predicted that he would be physically fit enough to serve for the rest of his term in office and a second term should he decide to run for re-election.

Jackson revealed that the president takes the following medications: Crestor, for lowering cholesterol, aspirin, Propecia for hair loss and Soolantra cream for rosacea, and that his height and weight were 6’3” and 239 lbs., respectively.  He plans on working with the president to lower his weight, which should be 10-15 pounds lower, Jackson said.

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